Scott Kelby can…
January 25, 2010 by Robert Louis Vanelli
Filed under News and Events, Through My Lens
Ok we have all heard the funny Chuck Norris jokes. Chuck Norris always knows the EXACT location of Carmen SanDiego or Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas. I thought it would be funny to start a Scott Kelby can… jokes. Like, Scott Kelby can see 48 stops of light or Scott Kelby does HDR, in the camera! Once we have them all, I will present them to him at Photoshop World in Orlando on March 24, 2010. Make them funny and leave your name to get credit for it!
Scott Kelby can format a memory card using ginger ale, a paper clip, and his mind.
Scott Kelby has a secret iPhone app that fixes your photos wirelessly–whether you want him to or not.
Scott Kelby doesn’t use a memory card, the photos store directly in his brain and then are transfered to his macbook through thought when he feels like it.
Scott Kelby can wirelessly trigger the sun
Scott Kelby can not win the praise of the British because he has never been here.
Kevin Bailey´s last blog ..Time
Scott Kelby can take a photo of Amy Winehouse and make her look good.
Scott Kelby doesn’t need to set the White Balance, the light will change to what ever he needs.
Alan´s last blog ..McNally shoots in San Diego
Scott Kelby can shoot a Canon lens on his D3.
Scott Kelby can view reality in RGB, Grayscale, LAB Mode and CMYK simultaneously.
Scott Kelby doesn’t use strobes, the brilliance coming from his mind can illuminate any scenario you may encounter.
Scott Kelby can speak French… in RUSSIAN!
Jamie Mastrio´s last blog ..The Ultimate Data Storage Unit
Scott Kelby doesn’t need to lug camera equipment around, Scott Kelby is the Camera!
Scott Kelby doesn’t ever shoot in RAW – he never has to adjust in software
Scott Kelby doesn’t have to shoot with a Macro Lens – things just make themselves bigger for him
Scott Kelby does have to use Flash – the whiteness of his teeth is enough to illuminate any scene.
Scott Kelby’s images never show signs of ‘noise’ only the signs of sweet music.
Scott Kelby has not only photographed the Higgs Boson – he got it’s best profile and a portfolio too!
Scott Kelby naturally sees the world in HDR
Scott Kelby doesn’t have to clone out distractions, they just move out of the way when he takes the shot.
Neal Jacob´s last blog ..DC Snowpocalypse
Scott Kelby will write a book from these responses and it will be a best seller.
Scott Kelby doesn’t have light shaping tools, he just uses his only white shirt.
Except Scott only ever wears a black shirt–which is even more amazingQ
I love Neal Jacob’s and bobwyo’s !!
Troy Breidenbach´s last blog ..Roadhouse
If you have $5 and Scott Kelby has $5…Scott Kelby has more than you. (taken from Chuck Norris joke)
Troy Breidenbach´s last blog ..Roadhouse
When Scott Kelby does a 360 Panorama he doesn’t use a tripod the world rotates around him.
Scott Kelby can make any lens stop open to f0
Scott Kelby doesn’t use VR because he shakes. Everyone else around him shakes.
William Beem´s last blog ..The Bellagio
lol! ;D RT @vanelli: @ScottKelby doesn’t clone out distractions, they just move out of the way when he takes the shot. http://bit.ly/6k06iz
This comment was originally posted on Twitter
Kelby just started a new division with Polaroid. It’s the “Kelbyoid,” follow his instructions, push a button, and within a few mintues… “POOF” you’ll be a pro.
Scott Kelby does not zoom in, the world moves closer to him.
@ScottKelby jokes are still coming in great job! Scott Kelby does not zoom in, the world moves closer to him. http://bit.ly/6k06iz
This comment was originally posted on Twitter
Scott Kelby does not have to GO on a Worldwide Photo Walk, the worlds walk to him!
In the beginning there was nothing… Then Scott Kelby wirelessly triggered his SB-900 speedlight, flashed that nothing in the face and said “Just One Light.” That is the story of the origin of the universe.
Scott Kelby never adjusts his camera’s shutter speed. Time stands still for as long as he leaves the shutter open.
Scott Kelby is the only photographer capable of photographing Chuck Norris delivering a round-house kick… to the camera.
Scott Kelby can save JPGs with lossless compression. None of the data wants to leave the photo.
Rob Sylvan´s last blog ..Photofocus: Two Fast Ways to Apply Develop Settings to Multiple Photos in Lightroom
@Lightroomers Scott Kelby can save JPGs with lossless compression. None of the data wants to leave the photo.. http://bit.ly/6k06iz
This comment was originally posted on Twitter
@ScottKelby doesn’t need to set the White Balance, the light will change to what ever he needs. thanks @ShotLivePhoto http://bit.ly/6k06iz
This comment was originally posted on Twitter
hilarious roast to be of scott kelby http://exposurepas.com/2010/01/25/scott-kelby-can/
This comment was originally posted on Twitter
Finishing up the Scott Kelby can jokes next week if youhave any to add, please send them http://bit.ly/6k06iz
This comment was originally posted on Twitter
The term ‘tripod’ was coined after Scott Kelby’s silhouette.
Scott Kelby doesn’t teach, he tells tricks.
Nikon pays Scott Kelby to use Nikon equipment.
Scott Kelby can shoot 8Gb of pictures on a 4Gb memory card.
There is a new fashion craze blazing through the creative world. The new WWSKD t-shirts, camera straps and other apparel. the acronym expands to What Would Scott Kelby Do?